Sunshine, Bunnies & Other Signs

I'm a firm believer in signs. Not stop signs or signs of old age (yes, already!)...but signs from Heaven. My husband, however, thinks I'm nuts. Sorry Brad - you knew I'd rat you out to the world eventually. If you have ever lost someone close to you, you might understand why I'm such a big believer though. It's the little things that happen at just the right moment or out-of-the-ordinary events that you immediately see a significance in. Those are the things that scream out to me "Look Mom; we're ok!" And as crazy as it may sound, I see these things and I believe them. I have to. It gives me peace of mind that they're ok and that they don't blame me. So I wanted to share a couple stories with you...if you are a newly bereaved parent, I want you to know it's ok to look for the signs but also ok if you don't see them right away...

At first, I missed the signs. Constantly. Thank God for Robyn. One of my BFF's from back home, she's always been the level-headed one, and thankfully also very observant! At the funeral, our funeral director told me that they didn't put a canopy out at the cemetery, so he hoped it didn't keep misting/raining as it had been. He said "the weather is in Tyler & Ethan's hands today." When we got to the cemetery, it was overcast but not raining. Robyn noticed that at the exact moment when the priest started the graveside service, the sun came out.

Then there was the March of Dimes walk. We had 4 blue balloons tied to Addison's wagon and were going to let them go after the walk. Addison wanted to keep one, so that left 3 to release. Robyn had the camera and took pictures of us letting the balloons go. A few seconds after they were released, she started yelling for us to look at them...one balloon had drifted off by itself but the other two were floating together. One of those two then swooped down and head-butted the other one...something Ethan had done to Tyler (or vice versa!) during an ultrasound one day. And they floated together for as long as we could see them.

Then there are the bunnies. We planted a memory garden in our backyard, and for a lot of the summer, we've had these two bunnies that were always hanging around it. It was ALWAYS two bunnies. I never saw one without the other, and sometimes they even appeared to be playing tag or something. I knew it was another sign. I even named them Tyler Bunny & Ethan Bunny and took their picture for the boys' scrapbook. Then a good friend from our neighborhood fell ill with cancer. During her last week at hospice, I was feeling down and walked to the backyard to water the memory garden. And that was the day that I saw THREE bunnies. A couple days later, that friend passed away. I saw those three bunnies one more time together, and now I haven't seen any of them since. I truly believe it was a sign that the boys and our dear friend have found each other in Heaven.
M - Love you, lady. Wish you were here, but I know you're taking good care of my boys and making one heck of a guardian angel to your family & friends.

So keep a relaxed eye out for the signs...look too hard and you'll miss them, but on the other hand, you need to have your eyes open to see them. No matter who you're missing, you'll find your sign.

Thanks for reading,
Jen